Letter: Here’s a complete rapid transit network for Edinburgh

Central Edinburgh in our fantasy landscape. Image: the mystery contributor.

Editor’s note: First we made up our own Birmingham Crossrail. Then a reader emailed in his own proposal for Bristol Crossrail. Then came the tram network for Newport.

In today’s game of fantasy metro network, we’re heading north, with a scribbler who wishes to remain anonymous,

I first had the idea of designing a transport system for Edinburgh following a kickabout at Peffermill, the home of the Edinburgh university sports pitches. In an area that I believed to be miles from any kind of railways or stations, I was surprised to see a lone freight train crawling past, just behind the hedges at the far end of the football fields.

On returning home, I did some research to find that this line is known as the ‘Edinburgh Suburban and Southside Railway’, but has been closed to passenger trains since 1962. In its heyday, this line would have been part of a large loop, passing through Edinburgh’s main terminus Waverley. I also discovered that the line was almost reopened to passenger traffic in 2015, but this never materialised.

So this got me thinking: what would an extensive metro/rail system for Edinburgh look like?

Public transport as things stand in Edinburgh is a mixed bag. The Lothian Buses cover an extensive network and are reliable and good value for money, but with Edinburgh suffering from congestion, they can be a slow way to travel, especially in the city centre. Then there are the trams – but this service only really serves the airport, a few out of town business districts, and some western suburbs.


Suburban rail is also lacking – there are only 12 stations in the entirety of Edinburgh. In Glasgow, albeit a bigger city, there are 61 National Rail stations and 15 subway stations.

On the map I have used three ‘modes’– the trams, suburban rail, and the underground lines. The trams are fairly self-explanatory: I’ve just integrated the line on to the map without changing anything. For the suburban rail, I’ve used a mixture of existing lines (used and disused), slightly extending some in a couple of areas. I’ve taken inspiration from the London Overground and Paris RER system; different routes run on the same route in the style of the Overground, whilst like the RER the lines are given different letters from A to E.  In a nutshell, the suburban rail is designed to use lines which already exist or have existed in the past, including reopening some closed down stations.

The major part of this operation was the creation of the underground lines. I basically just grabbed a pencil and connected up major districts of Edinburgh, making sure that places that would require a lot of passenger demand are well connected – for example, Edinburgh Airport, Holyrood, the main business districts and major suburbs such as Leith.

On the subject of Leith, the area used to be served by a large station known as ‘Leith Central’; this closed to passengers in 1952 but the derelict building remained for many years afterwards. A scene in Irvine Welsh’s cult novel Trainspotting, in which Frank Begbie comes across a homeless man in the station who he then realises is his father, takes place here.

Click to expand. Or select Open In New Tab to look at the full sized version.

I’ve played about with Waverley, Edinburgh’s central hub station, as well. The blueprint would basically be one massive interconnected station with overground railway services running out of Waverley, underground trains running out of St James’ underground station, and trams running from York Place as they do in real life.

I have tried to imagine this all being integrated with the St James’ shopping centre redevelopment to create one huge transportation/shopping complex: think the World Trade Center transportation hub in New York. To aid congestion at Waverley, I’ve added in the pink ‘rapid ring’, a small circular line covering the city centre.

Yes, I realise the stations are too densely together for a city like Edinburgh, but I guess that’s the joy of ‘fantasy transport planning’ with no constraints. On that subject, I’d be intrigued if someone can give me an estimate of the cost of building this. Especially considering the Edinburgh tram line alone cost around a billion pounds…

Anonymous, Edinburgh

 

 
 
 
 

Everybody hates the Midlands, and other lessons from YouGov’s latest spurious polling

Dorset, which people like, for some reason. Image: Getty.

Just because you’re paranoid, the old joke runs, doesn’t mean they’re not out to get you. By the same token: just because I’m an egomaniac, doesn’t mean that YouGov isn’t commissioning polls of upwards of 50,000 people aimed at me, personally.

Seriously, that particular pollster has form for this: almost exactly a year ago, it published the results of a poll about London’s tube network that I’m about 98 per cent certain* was inspired by an argument Stephen Bush and I had been having on Twitter, at least partly on the grounds that it was the sort of thing that muggins here would almost certainly write up. 

And, I did write it up – or, to put it another way, I fell for it. So when, 364 days later, the same pollster produces not one but two polls, ranking Britain’s cities and counties respectively, it’s hard to escape the suspicion that CityMetric and YouGuv are now locked in a co-dependent and potentially abusive relationship.

But never mind that now. What do the polls tell us?

Let’s start with the counties

Everybody loves the West Country

YouGov invited 42,000 people to tell it whether or not they liked England’s 47 ceremonial counties for some reason. The top five, which got good reviews from between 86 and 92 per cent of respondents, were, in order: Dorset, Devon, Cornwall, North Yorkshire and Somerset. That’s England’s four most south westerly counties. And North Yorkshire.

So: almost everyone likes the South West, though whether this is because they associate it with summer holidays or cider or what, the data doesn’t say. Perhaps, given the inclusion of North Yorkshire, people just like countryside. That would seem to be supported by the fact that...


Nobody really likes the metropolitan counties

Greater London was stitched together in 1965. Nine years later, more new counties were created to cover the metropolitan areas of Manchester, Liverpool (Merseyside), Birmingham (the West Midlands), Newcastle (Tyne&Wear), Leeds (West Yorkshire and Sheffield (South Yorkshire). Actually, there were also new counties covering Teesside (Cleveland) and Bristol/Bath (Avon), too, but those have since been scrapped, so let’s ignore them.

Not all of those seven counties still exist in any meaningful governmental sense – but they’re still there for ’ceremonial purposes’, whatever that means. And we now know, thanks to this poll, that – to the first approximation – nobody much likes any of them. The only one to make it into the top half of the ranking is West Yorkshire, which comes 12th (75 per cent approval); South Yorkshire (66 per cent) is next, at 27th. Both of those, it may be significant, have the name of a historic county in their name.

The ones without an ancient identity to fall back on are all clustered near the bottom. Tyne & Wear is 30th out of 47 (64 per cent), Greater London 38th (58 per cent), Merseyside 41st (55 per cent), Greater Manchester 42nd (53 per cent)... Not even half of people like the West Midlands (49 per cent, placing it 44th out of 47). Although it seems to suffer also from the fact that...

Everybody hates the Midlands

Honestly, look at that map:

 

Click to expand.

The three bottom rated counties, are all Midlands ones: Leicestershire, Northamptonshire and Bedfordshire – which, hilariously, with just 40 per cent approval, is a full seven points behind its nearest rival, the single biggest drop on the entire table.

What the hell did Bedfordshire ever do to you, England? Honestly, it makes Essex’s 50 per cent approval rate look pretty cheery.

While we’re talking about irrational differences:

There’s trouble brewing in Sussex

West Sussex ranks 21st, with a 71 per cent approval rating. But East Sussex is 29th, at just 65 per cent.

Honestly, what the fuck? Does the existence of Brighton piss people off that much?

Actually, we know it doesn’t because thanks to YouGov we have polling.

No, Brighton does not piss people off that much

Click to expand.

A respectable 18th out of 57, with a 74 per cent approval rating. I guess it could be dragged up by how much everyone loves Hove, but it doesn’t seem that likely.

London is surprisingly popular

Considering how much of the national debate on these things is dedicated to slagging off the capital – and who can blame people, really, given the state of British politics – I’m a bit surprised that London is not only in the top half but the top third. It ranks 22nd, with an approval rating of 73 per cent, higher than any other major city except Edinburgh.

But what people really want is somewhere pretty with a castle or cathedral

Honestly, look at the top 10:

City % who like the city Rank
York 92% 1
Bath 89% 2
Edinburgh 88% 3
Chester 83% 4
Durham 81% 5
Salisbury 80% 6
Truro 80% 7
Canterbury 79% 8
Wells 79% 9
Cambridge 78% 10

These people don’t want cities, they want Christmas cards.

No really, everyone hates the Midlands

Birmingham is the worst-rated big city, coming 47th with an approval rating of just 40 per cent. Leicester, Coventry and Wolverhampton fare even worse.

What did the Midlands ever do to you, Britain?

The least popular city is Bradford, which shows that people are awful

An approval rating of just 23 per cent. Given that Bradford is lovely, and has the best curries in Britain, I’m going to assume that

a) a lot of people haven’t been there, and

b) a lot of people have dodgy views on race relations.

Official city status is stupid

This isn’t something I learned from the polls exactly, but... Ripon? Ely? St David’s? Wells? These aren’t cities, they’re villages with ideas above their station.

By the same token, some places that very obviously should be cities are nowhere to be seen. Reading and Huddersfield are conspicuous by their absence. Middlesbrough and Teesside are nowhere to be seen.

I’ve ranted about this before – honestly, I don’t care if it’s how the queen likes it, it’s stupid. But what really bugs me is that YouGov haven’t even ranked all the official cities. Where’s Chelmsford, the county town of Essex, which attained the dignity of official city status in 2012? Or Perth, which managed at the same time? Or St Asaph, a Welsh village of 3,355 people? Did St Asaph mean nothing to you, YouGov?

Jonn Elledge is the editor of CityMetric. He is on Twitter as @jonnelledge and on Facebook as JonnElledgeWrites.

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*A YouGov employee I met in a pub later confirmed this, and I make a point of always believing things that people tell me in pubs.