Here are all the names of London tube stations that we’ve just stopped noticing are weird

What the hell. Swiss Cottage. Image: Oxyman/Wikipedia Commons.


 “The next station is Gnome. Change here for Elf, Cherubim and Gnome.”


Would be a lot less weird if it wasn’t a good eight miles away from where they actually built the arsenal.


It’s like something from a kid’s picture book where everything is labelled incredibly literally. Was even sillier when the next station along was still called Post Office. (It’s St Paul’s now.)


Disappointing lack of doggos.


Same, also a surprisingly long way from Barking.


But not by Bromley which, once again, is eight bloody miles awy.

Canada Water


Chalk Farm

Chalk isn’t a plant, lads.



Elephant & Castle


Grange Hill.


Hang on, that’s in Belgium isn’t it?


There are literally horns no the church, to be fair.

Kentish Town

Actually in Middlesex, nowhere near Kent.


Not only no knights, but no bridge either.


Might as well have a station called “oblong” or “dodecahedon”.

Oxford Circus

Plenty of clowns though, amirite?


Does any other London suburb promise such a vertiginous drop between name and reality?


To be honest the name’s fine, I just wish people knew how to pronounce it.

Roding Valley

The river’s more than 30 miles long, guys, this doesn’t narrow it down.

Seven Sisters

None that I’ve noticed.

Shepherd’s Bush

“Now where are those sheep hiding now?”

Shepherd’s Bush Market

Because one bush is never enough.


1. That’s not how that combination of letters should sound. 2. That’s not where Southwark is. Other than that you’re fine.

Swiss Cottage

Sure, let’s name a station after a novelty drinking establishment, why the hell not.


Okay, this one is definitely in Belgium.

Jonn Elledge is the editor of CityMetric. He is on Twitter as @jonnelledge and also has a Facebook page now for some reason. 

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Podcast: Dad jokes

The Ribblehead Viaduct, on the Settle to Carlisle line. Image: Getty.

81. Dad jokes

My dad died, in January. Which sucks. Since then, I've found finding myself cataloguing the various things I got from him, from my love of Only Fools & Horses and the work of Douglas Adams, to being slightly too fond of a drink. It's strange, in its way, the things we get from our parents that we take for granted – so much so that we stop thinking about where they came from at all.

Anyway – one of the things I did get from Dad, I think, is my interest in infrastructure and how places physically work. He was a water engineer, rather than a train nerd, but nonetheless, I think it was his own infrastructure geekiness that led my father to add the Buzzfeed (previously) and Guardian (soon) journalist Jim Waterson on Facebook, just so that he could occasionally argue with him about major works projects somewhere.

I've got a column about my dad in this week's issue of New Statesman. So I thought this was a good time to invite Jim back to the podcast, to talk, briefly, about my Dad, and at rather greater length about trains, as Jim walks me through his top 10 British railway journeys.

The episode itself is below. You can subscribe to the podcast on AcastiTunes, or RSS. Enjoy.

Jonn Elledge is the editor of CityMetric. He is on Twitter as @jonnelledge and also has a Facebook page now for some reason. 

Want more of this stuff? Follow CityMetric on Twitter or Facebook.