Screw it, here's a map of Paris superimposed on London

Aww, look at the cute little thing. Maps of Paris and London taken from Google Maps.

Paris, as we may have mentioned before, is surprisingly small. It has a population of only 2.3m, which isn't that many for one of the great cities of the world. It's also only six miles across. This is a case of “underbounding”: a situation in which the formal limits of a city are far smaller than its functional area, which

a) creates a whole load of problems for the people who govern a metropolitan area, and

b) stops lovely family cities websites from make any sensible statistical comparisons.

Anyway. Because it's Friday afternoon, we decided to kick back, relax, and super-impose a map of Paris onto London, to give you some sense of exactly how small Paris really is.

We've placed the Île de la Cité, the historic heart of Paris, on London's Trafalgar Square, in an attempt to align the centres of the two cities. You can see the results above.

Imposed on London, the Périphérique ring road, which forms the border of Paris proper in most places, crosses the Thames roughly at the Battersea Bridge and the Rotherhithe tunnel. The city stretches south to the borders of Brixton, and north to those of Holloway. Its westernmost outpost is around Wormwood scrubs; its east is at Greenwich. Montmatre sits above Camden Town.

So, yes, Paris is small – smaller than inner London, and not much bigger than its old rival’s central business district.

Except, this isn't really the whole of Paris, is it? It's the official city limits, yes. But any sensible definition would include the suburbs lying beyond the Périphérique, that are economically dependent on the city itself.

The French government has, belatedly, realised this, and from next year there will be a whole new body: the Metropole du Grand Paris, which will cover the whole urban region. At time of writing the exact boundaries that will have are a bit hazy – so, we've used this map to super impose the city's entire urban area on the London region too. (The red patch at the centre is the city proper.)

That looks much more like it – suddenly, London is all but invisible.  Greater Paris will actually be bigger than Greater London, once the deed is done.

That will help to reintegrate the banlieues and, hopefully, make the city work better.

So there we have it. Join us next week on CityMetric when we'll be firing up our trusty copy of Microsoft Paint once again and asking: Who would win in a fight – the Incredible Hulk or Superman?


 

 
 
 
 

There isn’t a war on the motorist. We should start one

These bloody people. Image: Getty.

When should you use the horn on a car? It’s not, and anyone who has been on a road in the UK in living memory will be surprised to hear this, when you are inconvenienced by traffic flow. Nor is it when you are annoyed that you have been very slightly inconvenienced by another driver refusing to break the law in a manner that is objectively dangerous, but which you perceive to be to your advantage.

According to the Highway Code:

“A horn should only be used when warning someone of any danger due to another vehicle or any other kind of danger.”

Let’s be frank: neither you nor I nor anyone we have ever met has ever heard a horn used in such a manner. Even those of us who live in or near places where horns perpetually ring out due to the entitled sociopathy of most drivers. Especially those of us who live in or near such places.

Several roads I frequently find myself pushing a pram up and down in north London are two way traffic, but allow parking on both sides. This being London that means that, in practice, they’re single track road which cars can enter from both ends.

And this being London that means, in practice, that on multiple occasions every day, men – it is literally always men – glower at each other from behind the steering wheels of needlessly big cars, banging their horns in fury that circumstances have, usually through the fault of neither of them, meant they are facing each other on a de facto single track road and now one of them is going to have to reverse for a metre or so.

This, of course, is an unacceptable surrender as far as the drivers’ ego is concerned, and a stalemate seemingly as protracted as the cold war and certainly nosier usually emerges. Occasionally someone will climb out of their beloved vehicle and shout and their opponent in person, which at least has the advantages of being quieter.

I mentioned all this to a friend recently, who suggested that maybe use of car horns should be formally restricted in certain circumstances.

Ha ha ha. Hah.

The Highway Code goes on to say -

“It is illegal to use a horn on a moving vehicle on a restricted road, a road that has street lights and a 30 mph limit, between the times of 11:30 p.m. and 07:00 a.m.”

Is there any UK legal provision more absolutely and comprehensively ignored by those to whom it applies? It might as well not be there. And you can bet that every single person who flouts it considers themselves law abiding. Rather than the perpetual criminal that they in point of fact are.


In the 25 years since I learned to drive I have used a car horn exactly no times, despite having lived in London for more than 20 of them. This is because I have never had occasion to use it appropriately. Neither has anyone else, of course, they’ve just used it inappropriately. Repeatedly.

So here’s my proposal for massively improving all UK  suburban and urban environments at a stroke: ban horns in all new cars and introduce massive, punitive, crippling, life-destroying fines for people caught using them on their old one.

There has never been a war on motorists, despite the persecution fantasies of the kind of middle aged man who thinks owning a book by Jeremy Clarkson is a substitute for a personality. There should be. Let’s start one. Now.

Phase 2 will be mandatory life sentences for people who don’t understand that a green traffic light doesn’t automatically mean you have right of way just because you’re in a car.

Do write in with your suggestions for Phase 3.